Are You Telling Yourself an Optimistic Story?

In my private practice counseling clients in Asheville, NC, daily, my clients are coming in and telling me about how difficult things are these days. This is a time of economic hardship for many. Many people are worried about their jobs or desperate because they don’t know how they are going to put food on the table for their family.

It is so easy to look at the situations in our lives and feel, “This is the way things are and therefore they are going to continue to be this way for a long time. . .” When this thought goes through your head it is easy to feel that the “bad stuff” in your life, whether that be poor health, the economy, being unemployed, etc.” is out of your control. This can easily lead to a feeling of helplessness.

Control is such an interesting concept. The truth is that there are many things that we are unable to control. We can’t control the weather, what our boss or friend thinks of us, we can’t control the traffic on the road. What we can control is our attitude toward what does happen to us and our expectation we have toward future events in our lives.

Our expectation that we have of future events in our lives is like a story that we tell ourselves that is optimistic or pessimistic. So what story are you telling yourself? Are you telling yourself, “Things are really bad in my life and there is no sign of them getting better anytime soon.”? Or, are you telling yourself, “I am going through a really rough time right now. I don’t like it, but I am going to be okay. I anticipate that things are going to turn around for me soon. I am going to start appreciating what is working in my life and I am going to look for evidence of my life improving!”? Your attitude makes a huge difference. The field of Positive Psychology has conducted research on the benefit of having a positive attitude and of having optimism and hope. Dr. Hilary Tindle, in her research found that optimism is related to increases in health and longevity. Optimism has also been linked to less depression in caregivers.  So think about the story you are telling yourself. Is it optimistic?
Deborah Barnett, Ph.D.
Positive Psychology in Asheville, NC
Phone Coaching for Personal Growth and Relationship Success